Okay.. It's regarding the bloody iPhone again. Seriously I don't give a damn about getting it man. :O When Dad said he's giving it to you, you wanted to give it to me. Fine, I'm okay with anything. After you fell in love with the games in the phone, you said you would like to keep it for yourself. Yea, you're the 長輩, I respect your decision. So I took your phone.
Because you did not know how to use many of the phone's functions, you wanted your phone back. But you were unsure if you wanted to give the phone to me. That day you saw me using your phone and doing fine with it, you said you missed your phone because you preferred Nokia. I was amazed because obviously Apple beats Nokia. You asked if I could exchange with you. I said "ANYTHING." But you didn't give me a reply... Okay.
After that, I asked you if you really wanted your phone back. You said you didn't feel like giving up the iPhone. = = Seriously, what's the problem with you man. Okay, take it I didn't ask.
That day we went to Orchard for new year clothes. When we were having dinner. Jingwei(my bro la) asked you if you could exchange with him. The deal was him taking iPhone, you taking back your Nokia while I would have his LG. I was thinking you would say NO because after all his PSLE result wasn't up to expectation. You were grinning so widely and replying a YES.
I did feel a bit disappointed. I asked a few times and you kept saying NO. Thinking his LG is new, I agreed to it. On the way back home, I asked you in a serious tone, "What's the reason for a NO when I asked last time?" You said I was questioning you. Do I have to fake a smile everytime when I don't want you to know how I really feel?
After that you took back your words, everything went to back to the beginning, no exchange was done. Anything, I wasn't in the mood to argue with you because it's pointless. This morning, you asked for an exchange again. This time, a "lucky draw". JingWei won the Scissors-Paper-Stone so he picked the pingpong ball from the container.
In the end, he picked the white one, which represented iPhone. You said now it's fair. I could tell how happy you were when it was giving to him. No matter how many times I asked you, you just disagreed. When he felt unhappy after you said you were giving to me, you didn't want to give me anymore. Seriously who do you think deserves more?
I used to cry when I sleep if I feel that you're biased. Don't worry, I won't again. I'm strong enough to face whatever decision you make. He shared opinions of girls in his class photo with you, he shared names of his crush with you. You never know anyone I liked. You weren't there with me when I faced problems. I fell down again and again, yet you knew NOTHING about it. My friends were the ones there with me.
You told me you like someone like Benjamin Ban. Do you even know who I truly like? Do you even know I'm not close to Ben Ban at all? When it first started, you didn't detect the change in me. When it ended, you knew nothing at all. Is it I was pro at acting and pretending nothing happened? Or you just didn't care about my emotions at all? Sometimes when I smile, can you even tell I am swallowing tears?
No, you don't.